It is a tradition during the month of our Blogaversary to ask a couple of our favorite bloggers for a list of Se7en + 1 “anythings…” Things they love or things they loathe!!! Best books, best blogs, things you love about blogging, best outings, best ice-cream flavors, places to visit, best foods, fun traditions, habits, kid stuff you still enjoy, summer fun, winter fun, even se7en +1 favorite words – whatever they like…
I’ve spent the week apart from my husband, and as they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder! As we count down to our 10th anniversary, I thought I’d share se7en+1 ways we invest in our marriage in the midst of raising four little ones:
- Laughter: Nothing ties our hearts together like laughing. We share inside jokes, have tickle fights and pillow fights and tease each other constantly. When we start to feel disconnected, I know that it means we haven’t laughed together enough recently!
- Going to bed together: We don’t always go to bed at the same time, but we try to do it more often than not. And my favourite part about going to bed together often is that it gives us a chance to just lay in bed and talk without the distractions of kids or TV or to-do lists.
- Dreaming: Which leads me to my next one…dreaming together. Our late night chats often lead to dreaming about the future, our future. We talk about future vacation destinations, what we’d do if we won the HGTV dream home and where we see ourselves in five or ten years.
- S-e-x: Can I say that three-letter-word here on Se7en? I know as women it’s common to get to the end of the day — having been touched by little people all. day. long — and just want to be left alone. But physical intimacy is an important part of investing in our marriage, and while it’s not happening on a daily basis, it’s something we prioritise, whether that means “scheduling” it ahead of time, going to bed earlier than usual or getting creative with when — or where — it happens.
- Flirting: This could probably go under #1, but I think it’s different enough that it deserves it’s own spot. Whether it’s sending a flirty text, leaving a note in your hubby’s pocket or just making eyes at each other across a room as you share a private joke, flirting is a fun way to connect and keeps the sparks alive!
- No bad-mouthing. One of the most important lessons my mom taught me about marriage was to never speak bad about my husband in public. I’m not talking about pretending he’s perfect (and there’s a place for talking about real issues with a trusted friend), but there’s no reason to get together with friends and husband bash; it just makes those little annoyances (and bigger issues!) even bigger. Knowing that we don’t do this stronger bond and trust in our relationship that wouldn’t be there if we were bashing or nitpicking each other when we were apart.
- Apologize: You know the saying about “Why do we treat strangers better than the people we love?” Yeah, that one. It gets me every time because it is so much easier to be patient and kind to someone I only have to spend 5 minutes with! I wish I could say I’d found the secret for treating the people I love better than strangers, but unfortunately I haven’t; it’s a work in progress. In the meantime, I apologise when I snap or get impatient. An apology isn’t an excuse for not doing better, but I think it helps protect our marriage in the meantime!
- Write love letters: My husband isn’t much for writing love notes anymore (but he sure was good at it when we were in college!), but my love language is words of affirmation, so I’m much more likely to pick up a pen and paper (or open a new email) and send him a note to tell him how much he means to me. I often get a note on Christmas and birthdays (because I’ve asked him to, even in lieu of gifts!), and there’s just something about having those words in writing that seals my heart to his even more. I’ll treasure each of his notes as long as I live!
And the Se7en + 1th thing:
Mandi Ehman lives in wild, wonderful West Virginia with her husband of ten years and four beautiful, spunky little girls. As a full-time work-at-home, homeschooling mom, she runs Life Your Way, a site that blends intentional and creative living, and Jungle Deals & Steals, where it’s all Amazon, all the time.
Thank-you so much Mandi Ehman of Life Your Way for your fabulous list and for joining our Celebrity Fun!!!
And to all our readers, you have to visit Life Your Way, there is something there for everyone to read!!! And it is via her site: Jungle Deals & Steals, that I find heaps of free books for my kindle on Amazon… Just saying!!! Have a great day!!!